DO YOUR THOUGHTS AND BELIEFS AFFECT YOUR RELATIONSHIPS?
- Published on Sunday, 21 April 2013 21:17
- 3 Comments
When I found this article by Sherianna Boyle in her Powered By Me blog, I wanted to share it with you. It has a beautiful message about how powerful our thoughts and beliefs are and how they affect the teacher student relationship, as well as all other relationships in our lives. Powered By Me
Beliefs and Thoughts: How Powerful are They and How Do They Affect Our Students Ability to Learn?
The teacher/student relationship is like all other relationships in our lives; the quality of communication and understanding are both key to the development of each student and the fulfillment of the teaching process. When students enter the classroom, we don’t know what their thoughts or belief systems are, or how it will affect their learning and behavior in the classroom and beyond.
Recently, one of my college students raised his hand in class. I called on him and after hearing his answer I told him he had a good choice of words. He became red in the face and made a comment back that he thought I was being sarcastic. As the teacher, I had to be aware that his response to what I meant as a compliment, might have stemmed from some sort of past belief in not being “good enough”, making him unable to accept my response as a compliment.
Before we can guide our students and children towards a solution for their problems, educators and parents must first be conscious of different behavioral patterns and what causes them. We cannot prevent or fix something that we don’t understand and by paying attention rather than reacting right away, we can create a better, more trusting environment for learning.
According to various studies on thoughts and beliefs, the difference between the two is the level of power. Many thoughts run through our heads constantly, but they only become truly powerful when we begin to make them real and give them life. Take for example the situation with my student. The possibility of repeated thoughts of not being “good enough” could have transformed into a belief, therefore becoming more mentally powerful and causing the classroom reaction. Had I not been aware of this possibility, our interaction could have ended in a negative, non-productive way, instead of in a way that gave me an opportunity to teach.
Beliefs are reflections of how we interpret the events in our lives. By paying attention, you are more likely to respond calmly, creatively and intuitively from a place of love and understanding rather than fear.
It has been my experience that my thoughts and beliefs color all of my relationships and experiences, frequently causing me to misinterpret where the other person is coming from. Because of this, I have done a lot of inner work to help clear the cobwebs of my past. This process is an ongoing one and has taught me to be more aware so that I can “respond calmly, creatively and intuitively from a place of love and understanding rather than fear” more often. When I do this, my life is fluid and peaceful. As I have practiced this more often, it slowly has become automatic, especially when I needed it the most!
What do you think? I would love to hear your comments!
As always I am excited to open my e-mail and see a message from you. Thanks for the meditation. I will incorporate it into my morning ritual along with my meditations from my three favorite meditation books. I have been really disconnected lately as a result of life happening. It always amazes me how easy it is to fall back into old behavior; however, what I have learned always trickles in, but at a slower pace. I am sad to say I was not able to rekindle a relationship with my sister. Being that I have a small family, only one sister, it seems really hard to let go. I can deal with my mom only because she lives 1500 miles away in a nursing home. They say the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree and my sister picked up where my mom left off. What I realized after doing a lot of writing that I have post dramatic stress in dealing with the issues in this family that only get worse. I read your message about beliefs and thoughts and how powerful they can be. I guess I needed a real life lesson to show me. I would like to share that lesson with you
I woke up last Sunday filled with anger, grief, hurt, and many more emotions. I was totally consumed by all of these emotions. I tried everything I have learned in the past up until now to overcome this situation. I could not sit still so I scurried around the house doing every physical job I could find, and I was even voicing my anger out loud along with moments of crying until I was exhausted. I was screaming to my God to please remove this from my being. I finally sat down and watched a documentary on T.V. named Buck. Buck Brannaman trains horses in the most humane way possible, but it was also about how he was abused ruthlessly by his dad. I believe that I was meant to see that documentary at exactly that time. I am totally connected to animals and have been all my life. Buck teaches horses with respect, gentleness, and love, and insists never to show anger because the horse will sense your emotions and will shut down. After his mother died his father’s abuse worsened and he and his brother ended up in a foster home. There were 18 boys in that foster home and he still to this day calls the lady Mom that took him and his brother into that foster home. She is still very much a part of his life. Buck says he is still not able to forgive his dad because he caused to much hurt. His saving grace in his words is he just stays in the moment most of the time. He travels around the country 9 months out of the year having seminars and helping people train their horses. He meets up with his wife and two girls, who are grown now, as often as possible. He is truly a loving and power example of the Laws of the Universe. I have had to grieve my family even though they are still alive. Like Buck things got worse for me after my father passed away. My father was a bright star in my life and he still shines through. I have been able to return to my higher self even though I still have the scars of the experience that I have been through. I knew even at the time I was experiencing those emotions that I had to go through it to get past it. I also did a lot of writing. I wrote down everything I needed to say to my sister even though I know I have said it many time before. I will take that and burn it and release myself from the burden. My sister has a life threatening heart disease and had gone to the hospital and wasn’t expected to live. I felt threatened because I felt like I had very little time left to make things right. I got dressed and undressed several times that night to go to the hospital. I waited until the next morning before I went because I knew I wasn’t wanted. I spent three days at the hospital and I haven’t heard from her or her children since. I have experienced this behavior over and over again. I know now that I can not allow myself to be harmed again. Each day gets better. I have my son who has been very supportive even though he is miles away too. We have always been able to get past our differences. I don’t ever want him to go through life without me or me without him. I have a very happy life with my dogs who teach me every day unconditional love. With Loving Energy Kathy…
It is so wonderful to hear from you! I am so happy that you are enjoying the meditation! Your story is beautiful and I appreciate you sharing it. You are growing and improving your life, one step at a time, which is perfect. Everything comes in its perfect timing. I know sometimes it doesn’t seem to come soon enough, or in the way we expected, but in time it reveals its own purpose for our highest good.
Thank you for keeping in touch. If you would like to do more work together, I am running a June Dollar Days Coaching Special. If you schedule two one on one sessions in June, you only pay $49 for the first one and $1 for the second! Let me know soon as there is limited space available.
Thank you again for sharing! With Loving Light and Smiles,
Many people have discovered their vision and their purpose through a home-based business to experience ‘success online’ which can create tremendous financial
success. As defined by Earl Nightingale, “Success is the progressive realization of a worthy idea. Doing this will allow others to see your level of experience.